Apni, tumi, tui
You and respect
Apni, tumi, tui
Bangla has three words for you, apni (you, respectful), tumi (you) and tui (you, intimate), and the verb ending changes with each.
Which ending
Respect: elders, strangers, at work
apni ... -en
For example
apni koren
you do (respectful)
Friends, family, younger people
tumi ... -o
For example
tumi koro
you do
Very close friends and small children
tui ... -ish
For example
tui korish
you do (intimate)
About this rule
How to tell
Pick by who you are talking to:
Apni (you, respectful): anyone older, or anyone you do not know. Start here.
Tumi (you): when they move to it, and with friends and family.
Tui (you, intimate): only the closest friends and young children. With anyone else it sounds rude.
Then match the verb:
Why it works
The three words run from most respectful to most intimate, and the verb follows the choice.
A wrong you is noticed more than a wrong tense, so when unsure, use apni (you, respectful).
Good to know
Families differ: many use tumi (you) with their parents, some use apni (you, respectful). Follow the family.
Good to know
The tumi (you) present looks the same as the tumi command:
Examples
Where do you live? (respectful)
Apni kothay thaken?
Word by wordyou(resp) where live
Where do you live? (friendly)
Tumi kothay thako?
Word by wordyou where live
Where do you live? (very close)
Tui kothay thakish?
Word by wordyou(close) where live
What do you do? (respectful)
Apni ki koren?
Word by wordyou(resp) what do
Do you know Rina?
Tumi Rina-ke cheno?
Word by wordyou Rina-to know
Slips to avoid
Apni (you, respectful) takes the -en ending.
Tumi (you) takes the -o ending.